How to Escape the Friendzone

Originally Published January 8th, 2014 by thenextbigthing

Hey guys (and if you are reading this article for advice you probably are a guy),

In this article I will (attempt) to teach you who are stuck in the gloomy, heartbreaking prison known as the “friendzone” to pull a Houdini and escape. Keep in mind, readers, that this is what has worked with me, and not every step may be applicable to your situation. If that is the case then I have shared the links to a couple other sources at the bottom of this article. Here are my 5 ways to escape the friendzone.

1. Find out what they like. You should talk to your potential significant other often and find out what they are interested in. In my case it turned out that we had a lot in common. For example, you may both enjoy reading, hunting, sports, or even hardcore game cube gaming. If it turns out that you don’t have much in common, or that she/he hates things that you love with a passion, such as your favorite sports team, your favorite activities, or *gasp* your large collection of mint condition action figures from the 60s,then you probably should rethink your quest to escape the friendzone. If you don’t have much in common than you are likely just physically attracted to the person, which is not a good base for a long term relationship to build off. However, if you do, in fact, have things in common you should jokingly say something along the lines of “You like watching TV, eating ice cream, and crying because you’re alone too? That’s pretty cool! Not too many girls are into that stuff.” (At this point I asked if she liked football, because I knew she did, and when she said yes, I said “Wow you’re perfect! Why aren’t we dating?” (jokingly). She’ll probably laugh at this point, but don’t be discouraged. Next you should say “In all seriousness though, I wish there were more girls like you.” This is where you pay attention to the response. If she/he  says something like “Yeah, I wish there were more guys like you” then you should go for it. If you say “Hey, we’ve never really given “us” a try.” It may work. You’ve just used logic to try to get out of the friendzone. Why isn’t that used more often???

2. Remind them of the things you’ve done together. If you haven’t known this person for long and have somehow been placed in the friendzone then this may not apply to you. If you get her/him thinking about all the good times you’ve had together, or even challenges you’ve gone through together, it creates a kind of bond between the two of you.  If you really wanted to you could say “Every time I see you it makes my day 71.333% better.” Or say that you’d like to spend more time together. Possibly both.

3. Give them compliments. This one is fairly easy. Tell her that she’s special and that you’ve never met anybody like her. Tell him that he makes you laugh. Tell her that she’s pretty (Etc.). I’d recommend trying this in combination with any of the other strategies listed.

4. Come out and tell the person you like her/him and that you want to be more than friends. Say she/he  has all the characteristics of the ideal girlfriend or boyfriend, but those are also the characteristics of a good friend. Ask them out. Just do it. This way, the person will notice that you have confidence, a very attractive trait. It also shows that you have good self-esteem, as you are not afraid of rejection (back to gta v, soda, and a bag of chips), or that you have confidence that they will say yes. If you really want to you can always go with my favorite excuses if this fails- “my friend took my phone” or “I got dared to ask you out”, which can take you out of the embarrassment spotlight if in public.

5. Finally, if none of these work, just find your own way out, or accept that this person may not be right for you. You’re wasting your time trying to get someone who just isn’t that in to you. Face it- many high school relationships don’t last that long anyway, and even if you escaped the friendzone this person would most likely just be a faint memory in the back of your head once you go to college, or get a job, or immediately pack your bags and leave Wisconsin forever upon graduating. You could stop talking to the person, and maybe they’d come back to you when they realized that you were the one that had been there for them before and now they couldn’t live without you. Alternatively, you could just enjoy your friendship as it is.

In conclusion: As somebody who has been on both sides of the friendzone, I can tell you that a combination of the first four will likely bring you the most success. I know this because they have worked for me, granted, I am a pretty attractive guy (my mommy told me so), so it was easy for me. Until next time, stay classy Franklin High School.