New Changes in the Cafeteria

The food served in the school cafeteria is the most nutritious and delicious food around.  The amazing tastes of cardboard mixed with plastic are something that you could only get in Franklin High School’s cafeteria.  To make the unique experience of eating in a high school cafeteria better, the school has decided to make some changes.

Limiting student’s options of food was always a goal of the school.  That’s why the ethnic line is being closed down.  The reason behind it?  Students stress too much about all the options in the cafeteria.  Often throughout the day, we hear student’s ask what is for lunch and when they don’t know, they may start to panic and feel the need to run to the cafeteria in order to read the whiteboard and grab their desired meal in a reasonable amount of time.  This worrying has affected classroom performance.  Not being able to concentrate during a lesson right before lunch has caused grades to plummet. You heard me right.  It’s not because students are unmotivated or too tired to put any effort in, it’s because they can’t decide what they want for lunch.  Closing the ethnic line would be a great way to reduce stress before lunchtime because there would be one less option to stress about.

A pricing change is in order because of the ethnic line being taken away.  Everything will be increased by five dollars.  EVERY.  SINGLE.  FOOD.  ITEM.  Because the quality of the food gets better and better everyday, many students are almost begging to pay more for the high quality food served in their very own high school cafeteria.  The new prices will reflect the quality of the food.  There will be no need for high school seniors to leave for free block to grab food that tastes like actual meat and cheese.  Who would want to eat real food, when the taste of cardboard is so highly sought after?  

With all the changes in the high school cafeteria, a healthier student body is almost guaranteed.  This is exactly what schools desire and many surrounding schools will follow suit with Franklin’s updated lunch program.  

Disclaimer: This article is part of the Saber Slate’s Satire Series and should not be taken as fact or reality. The issues that these articles are based off of are, however, relevant. We invite you to contemplate issues in society and how satire and the media can explain them.

4 thoughts on “New Changes in the Cafeteria

  • April 7, 2016 at 10:53 AM
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    I don’t know about everyone else in the school, but I happen to love all the lunch lines we have at FHS. It wouldn’t be reasonable to just state that our lunch is compared to some cardboard and plastic. I think that an issue we have in this school is that we aren’t grateful enough for anything we have. We really need to have some sense of gratitude for ourselves. Another thing is that the ethnic line is such a spectacular way to get to know multiple cultures and ethnic backgrounds at our school. If we want to solve issues, we should stop complaining and create rational and reasonable solutions.

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    • April 11, 2016 at 10:30 AM
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      I think if I pay for food it should be good not crap

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      • April 12, 2016 at 9:42 AM
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        I agree with angry student, if we’re paying, the food should actually taste good.

        Reply

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